Time
by ButterCashier
Summary: A story about travelling through history, fighting and overcoming.
1. The Time Trilogy - B1 - Blurb

TIME

Blurb: This blurb is on the front for no reason. So, who wants to read a story? No one? Well don't then. Bye. BYE! Oh, I won't let you read this story. Too bad, you just read it. Actually no you did not. But here goes...That is the end of the blurb...I TYPED THAT IS THE END OF THE BLURB! REALLY? YOU _STILL _DON'T BELIVE ME? - -ERROR 404-. READ THE STORY THEN! It's not my fault I have made the blurbs all six lines. It's wearing me out. I wrote some blurbs first. Anyway... Bad luck!


	2. The Time Trilogy - B1 - C1

**THE ADVENTURE OF HAM BREAD!**

So here we are then, a brand new series made up completely. It is not meant to be a good, well written story. It is meant to be a funny, complicated story, and it achieves this, as far as I know. You logically came to this blurb to read what lies inside, and without revealing too much I can say it involves someone called Fraaz, a teacher known as Miss. Miss, music lessons, an execution room and a whale. But don't read it, it's terrible. If you're still planning on reading this, don't say I didn't warn you. Bad luck!

Chapter 1: The Ass-embly

This is a story about a boy named Ham Bread. He hid a supersonic laser beam in a whale once. He goes to school at . His best friend is Jake Dick, a boy, in case you couldn't tell. He can speak whale! Wow! Woah! Holy gosh! Anyway...Today is Thursday. Ham ran to school, along Falkers Street, He followed a yellow brick road.

"The whistles gone", said Jake.  
"Who took it"? asked a vey confused piece ofHam, which was his mouth.

"No, no. It's ...whistled." Jake and Ham ran to the classroom. There was a new teacher there. Isaac Newtown came over and said these exact words, no less, or more:  
"It's Miss Miss."  
"I didn't quite catch that. Miss who?"

"You missed it? Miss. Miss."

"Hmm, I wonder if..."  
"What did you say?"  
"Oh, you've got to listen,or you'll miss it." Ham just remembered he must ask his teacher about glue sticks.  
"Miss...(trying to remember her name)...Kiss(putting a finger to his lips  
as he remembered).  
"I'm not going to." said Miss Miss.  
"Not going to what?" asked Ham.  
"Kiss you, you kitkat!" shouted Miss Miss with much force. Suddenly the head teacher, , came in.  
"HOW DARE YOU TRY AND KISS ME, YOU CHOCOLATE-FACED DEVIL!" Miss Miss slammed the door, and shouted  
"I ORDER WE GO TO ASSEMBLY, NOW!" Everyone, including Ham, rushed out. "Toffee- treated trifle!" said Jake.

We all walked into the hall. Mr. Dimwit was there, proud to be there, and  
licking his lips, as if to say he'd eat us. In fact, that's exactly what he was planning. "Hello, I am very disappointed in you," he said, pointing at . "WHA-" started .  
"Yes." he continued, "You were eating my toast. So go on, sick it up." Two teachers grabbed her and threw here down over and over, sicking up glue sticks, bacon, three small boys, dog poo, a thought to be extinct dinosaur triceratops until, on the 63rd throw up, she spat out some toast!  
"BAH, do you think that was all? Throw her in THE EXECUTION ROOM. Kill her! Destroy the school! Murder the head teacher! And the rest of you, out to play. But first, we must kick some ass. Iamagoat, come here! NOW!" Iamagoat went there, then.  
"Let me kick your ass."  
"Fine by me." Mr. Dimwit kicked his ass.  
"Now sit down." He sat down. "Playtime. But first we must all hail the donkey." A donkey crashed through the walls, and everyone fed it shrimps. "Playtime, mate!" Everyone in their toothpaste ways ran outside screaming. Everyone in the universe.

It was 34 '0' clock, and Jake played  
"Eat your soul", quite literally, in fact! Jake heard the whistle was about to blow, and told Ham.  
"IT'S GONNA BLOW? AARRRGGGGGG"! Ham ran inside a bin, and shut the lid...  
After five-hundred and fifty years, (They're immortal.) seven nights, and two days of searching, they found him in the bin. "HAM BREAD, WHY, WHY, WHY, WHY, WHY, WHY,

WHY, WHY,...(1 HOUR LATER) WHY, WHY? By this time Ham was asleep, still inside the bin. Several minutes later, he woke up in the classroom.


	3. The Time Trilogy - B1 - C2

CHAPTER 2: MUSIC LESSONS!

"Right everyone" said , " I want you all to go into groups of 5. After all,  
there are 37 of three are away, making 35. PERFECT." The class tried this, and in the end, only one was left: String Tie. " ..." then said, before he had finished " I don't want to." "Wha-" spluttered String.  
String had to go to THE EVACUATION ROOM! " That's the way to get rid of them.  
Now then, class it's time for music. Right group one:Wheel burrow, Mole Barrow, Kitchen Hand, Sink Arm, Drunk Face. You will have the violins. Group two: Oboe's. Three:Saxophones. Four: (which had me, by the way.) Organ's.(This will sound ridiculous.) Five: Xylophones! And following that was the most awful thing you've ever heard! " Splendid. Absolutely incredible. I've never heard such a magnificent tune in my life. " said . "Now class, I think we should do this in our assembly. Everyone will simply love it. And of course, if it were bad, we'd all be executed. HA,ha, I love a joke. Imagine that: BANG, we'd all be dead. Pity hates things with: Violins, oboe's, saxophones, organ's and xylophones. But this will be wonderful. He'll..." " He'll chew your bottom, that's what." said Sink, dropping water everywhere, crying, i believe it's called. We'll all be executed. In 3 days." "Don't worry" spoke Drunk, " We'll get out of this." he said with determination. The chewy-baboon-like-minestrone-from-hell, not that I know what a Minestrone is." "He's a filling-in-champion, not that I know what that means." said Mole. Play time. Diary: Me and fraaz will soon have the school. I need to capture Ham, he's the only hope they have...


	4. The Time Trilogy - B1 - C3

CHAPTER 3: THE UN-SECRET-SECRET PLAN!

Day 2: 1 day till execution. Ham was walking to school when he saw a note, on which he found it said " Ham, do not go to school. Jake is planning to make sure you die. You must escape or. DON'ASWTGKKFGO JBOM LISTENIFVPJDFVVIVJDDDFTOITBJDIO. The note ended there. It had been typed, obviously. But, what was that at the end. And who wrote that. Ham put it in his pocket and ran to school, against Jake. There he was. Ham ignored him and saw...Miss Miss there? What? She looked a little different yes, but.. she has been executed. There was only one answer: She had not gone in. In which case... Ham kissed her. " GO TO THE EXECUTION ROOM. NOW!" shrieked Miss Miss.

Right then, what a great start. A mysterious note, Miss Miss being...alive, and Ham going to die. Even if Miss Miss went into the room, they properly missed her. Even if Ham got out alive, Jake could kill him. Why? How? When? Who? Now what?  
How could things get worse. Of course, right there, on the table, was...ANOTHER NOTE: I warned you. I thought this would happen. So I put a key in the note. But, you must leave school. Jake will kill you. You mustjgsofdon'tfpdofplistenogkwogowigwgistopdonotlistenlspf. Ignore that. Now hurry. Sure enough, there was a key. But who was this? And who keeps writing not to listen? Now he had a choice. He could run away, or not listen. He'd not listen for a while longer. If Jake was trying to kill him, he must know why. Just who was this? Still, the first thing was to talk to Jake.


	5. The Time Trilogy - B1 - C4

Chapter 4:FRAAZ AND HIS MISTAKE.

Ham took the key and tried to open the door. It worked. The moment he stepped outside, he saw ANOTHER NOTE: Please, avoid Jake. He will kill you. Run. Now. However, you want my name. Well, I will tell you: Jake. The note had been ripped off some more paper. Jake? Jake was telling Ham that he would kill him. Well, that makes no sense. Unless... Jake has to do it but doesn't want to so he tells him to run away. So whatever happens, the person who wrote this is making it happen. How does he know. Is he from the future? No, that's not possible. Unless...Jake is writing from the future to the past to warn Ham that he Killed him in the past. So Jake must kill Ham to make sure time itself flows properly. "So I must not die at the execution, whatever happens." thought Ham. Suddenly a loud beeping noise was heard and a huge machine appeared in front of Ham. A person stepped out of it. "My name is Jake, Jake Dick. I come from you're future. A person called Fraaz is going to mess up the future by killing me in the past, meaning I can never kill you. You must keep Jake alive so I can kill you. If he kills me a paradox will be created and anything that happened because of me won't of happened. Jake does not know he must kill you, and you must tell him he must. Protect him and you from Fraaz and it will mean time is saved. He must kill you because otherwise, I would not of told you you must protect him and he must kill you thus me not being here, creating a paradox. Those notes were by Fraaz but his mistake was he told you Jake will try and kill you, wanting to make you go but making you more curious. He even let you out so I could speak, but he wanted you to go. Goodbye, and I hope time flows well. I shall know if you have failed, because I will not have been. You must not die. Goodbye." He stepped back into the time machine and left to the future. "I know what I must do."


	6. The Time Trilogy - B1 - C5

CHAPTER 5: School Domination!

"How can I explain to past Jake, or present Jake, if you like." thought ran over to him. "Jake, listen. You have to kill me." "What? What the hell are you on about?" "It's hard to explain. You see..." "Jake" asked Mole, "want to play eat your soul?" "Yes!" said Jake. Ham thought. "Hm, hmm, mm, mmm, tasty, mmm, hmm... I've got it! Mole can't be doing that. It must be...Fraaz!" Ham ran over to Jake, and sure enough,no, very sure, Fraaz was eating Jake's soul. "Jake" Ham pulled him away and ran inside. Fraaz stole everyone's soul and made them follow Jake and Ham. "Kill Jake." said Fraaz. Ham saw Jake was limping and carried him into the toilets. "Jake, Fraaz has control of the school!" shouted Ham. "Ugh...who's...Fraaaaaahhhhhhhh!" "Jake, there's only one way to hide you." said Ham "and that way is..."Jake then spluttered " down the toilet!"


	7. The Time Trilogy - B1 - C6

Chapter 6: Down The Toilet!

Ham pushed Jake down and flushed. "I'll die if they find me...so...JAKE!" Ham lept into the toilet and was washed down a tunnel. He could hear Miss Miss outside. There was Jake,but, why'd he stopped? Ham was doomed. Jake was too Fat to go further into the tunnel! "Does it...burbleburble...count...if...this..happens...Jake is...killing...me..by...doing...this... ...cough." Jake suddenly wisped down the tunnel, chest and all( No, actually he'd left his head behind! No!) with Ham at his toe. Yet again Jake stopped. They'd arrived...somewhere. Ham had to push Jake out, in which "Get out, you barboling baboon, you, you, you iddlestick-sick flatnose, you. Ham suddenly found out why they'd stopped: He was shoving Jake up someones bum! Jakes head was inside it! They finally got out, Jake's head still stuck inside this person's bottom. Ham tugged him out and they lept back inside the toilet. This happened 23 more times until, at last, the arrived at THE OILLY OIL BATH OF OILINESS! Jake and Ham climbed out( Or rather, Ham pushed Jake out) and they were in whales! No, not the place, the creature! A whales stomach! They were loosing air. "Jake, this is all because it was your...idea. This..is...because...of you! You have to survive! Suddenly the whale did the water-splurting-thinggymijigure! The water risey thing. Jake was pushed up with Ham and they landed on the whale. Well, are hero's seem stuck, but they can make the whale move. "Jake, remember, you can speak whale! Go on. Direct it to Spain!" "Whalloo-yeebutty - must-mush-orry-tow-spac-or-wie-painy-wetou-olliure- falliurf-fwylrid-ofd-awwfraax-offd! (Try pronouncing this!) The whale traveled to spain in 5 hours - it was a Speed Dolf Whale! Jake and Ham clambered off. "Right then, Jake, you have to kill me. Don't ask why. It will take too long to explain." "Righto." Jake walked over to a man. "Can I kill him?" "Of course" spoke the man, handing him a gun.

"That was easy." said Jake. "Now for the hard bit." "  
Jake" said Ham.  
"Yes?"  
"Before you kill me, tell the whale to open it's mouth".  
"Youth"...etc...etc...The whale opened it's mouth. Ham climbed in and took out a... "THAT'S A SUPERSONIC LASER BEAM!" cried Jake.

"Yes" said Ham. "After you kill me, take this." he said handing him it, " and kill all the hypnotised people at school with it." "Okay. Now then, THE KILL!"


	8. The Time Trilogy - B1 - C7

Final Chapter: Ham's had his toast!

Jake fired the gun at Ham.  
"J...ke...time..flows...wait...machine...schoo...future..." Ham fell to the ground. "What on earth. Machine + Future + Time flows = Confused Jake! Jake took the whale back to school, and did as he was told. He killed them all. Suddenly a loud beeping noise was heard, and a huge machine appeared. "The machine." gasped Jake. Future Jake stepped out. I am you in the future...etc...explaining...etc... Jake now knew everything. Literally! He went home and had a bath. Had a dinner. Created a new head. Destroyed the universe. The usual. Until, on one green night, Jake saw a note: This is only the beginning...


	9. The Time Trilogy - B2 - Blurb

THE ADVENTURE OF JAKE DICK!

So here at last is story number two, and this is once again the blurb. I'm writing this after I've written this story, but whatever. This story, in case you were wondering, I mean it's probably why you looked here, contains such things as a piece of poo, a random bee, some plot twists, and also some running. So there we have it. But don't read this, because it's pointless. As Inspector Chelmey might have said, what utter rubbish! So anyway, have no fun in reading it. Badbye! Bad luck!


	10. The Time Trilogy - B2 - C1

This is about Jake Dick, who, if you remember, killed Ham. Now everyone knew nothing of the reason. So the police were after him, and he happened to be eating fish and chip at his house...

CHAPTER ONE:THE GREAT LUMP!

The police arrived. "You've had your chips" said police officer Ican'tdoit. "No, I haven't. I'm eating my fish." "WHAT! Okay, what HAVE you had?" "My potatoes. Want some chips?" "No, I'm taking you to Jail." "We'll... we could have a chat. Eat a few pies."  
"I'm taking you to jail. Get him." "Yeah, boss." "No, you." "YOU. I do it all the time. You're just too lazy. Here, why don't we have a few chips?" Police officer 2 ate several chips. "Get out!" shouted Police officer 1. "Now, you, boy, come with me." "No, I have to create a time machine. I must!" "Nonsense" shouted police officer 1.

Bang! Jake was in jail. There was a note: Please escape. I left the key in my butt. Go and poo.  
Jake couldn't poo. He started eating his own butt. Then, he had a idea. Why not, if he ever got out, serve his butt for dinner? Yes. Perfect! But the key was not there. Suddenly, just as he was about to take another bite, some poo came out, right into his face. In his mouth, too. The key was also there. He spat it out. Suddenly the poo came to life. "I am the amazing poo, and I'm going to throw myself at you!" "What. Could he be dreaming? He pinched himself. Just to make sure, he pinched the poo, too. (The next part to be sung) "Give it, give it, give it to me. The metal hook-thing called a key!" "Only if you would eat me more. Otherwise life is such a bore.!" "Oh, no, I will not now, you taste like some slime and a cow!" "Right then, I'll build a machine. It will have leavers and a load of steam." "Will it go into the past? I hope you can as this is you're last." "Okay, I'll do it now." He did it. Then, there was a pow! (Stop singing) The machine started operating. Jake and the poo walked inside. Well, the poo slithered. "Have any sticky notes?" Jake asked. "No" replied the poo. "Well, let's go!"


	11. The Time Trilogy - B2 - C2

CHAPTER TWO: THE BEE!

"Now then. Where shall we go? I don't care where." "Poo Palace!"

"NO WAY! Let's go to 4763, just to cheek it works." They stepped out. They weren't in the jail. They were in some kind of Chinese casino. A sign nearby had on it : LEAVE THE GIRL. IT'S THE MAN I WANT! "What does that mean?" Suddenly trillions of girls rushed into the time machine. One of the girls had fallen over, unconscious. Jake also lied in the time machine, the poo in his mouth, He, too, was unconscious. Nearly everyone left, except one lady. She just happened to say "Leave the girl. It's the man I want." The girl was leaved. The man was wanted. The lady pushed the man up, and kissed him. She got quite a shock, as the poo jumped into her mouth as she did this. She also swallowed the key, and the poo, and fell on the ground. 2 months later...

A bee was flying round Jake. He stung Jake 406675281734 times before he woke up! "A googolplex more minutes, mum."! Jake instantly fell asleep. The bee stung him 176069340695306979294960222697999607950605000069586845 more times, and, err, to his approval, nothing happened. Jake was inside a huge city, called THE RAPTURE! THE RAPTURE was very nasty. Horrible chainsaws held by fearsome robots. Machine guns zapping people whenever one saw one. The ruler of this evil land: A pea! One, small, tiny fraction of a pea which didn't even move owned the world! Jake got up. He was in a alleyway, or so it looked. "Who rules all this?" Jake asked. "The pea." "The WHAT?" "One, tiny little pea. Why?" "I...can't let this be earth in the future. I must s-stop it!" "Never (Actually, that would be good! In that case, as none will suspect him...) "Absolutely! If the

machine guns spot you, and scan you as human, you'll be deaded. DEADED!" "What does deaded mean?" wondered Jake. "You're going to die, more or slightly more, actually then less!" Jake ran round the corner. A machine gun was looking right at a wall. It was 1mm tall and 67m wide! There were other machine guns, too! "4879 seconds to warp" one said. "What warp?" asked Jake. "A warp to the past. They shoot so fast when it's time comes that it appears. Its more or less a time machine that goes to the past. They create paradoxes that shouldn't be there. Last year, anyone in 2034 would have died..." "Everyone?" Jake squeaked. "Yep!" "EVERYONE! Okay, no big deal." "Where are they going next?" Jake asked. "2011". "Oh, no, if I die it'll be the end. Paradox 2!" "Let's just go." The bee: Called Pope, flew across. Next, Jake strode across. Jake was, after all, a dog. Didn't you know? After climbing the tower, they were near the top. "If anything hears us, or see's us, we're deaded!"said the bee. "DEADED?" "DEADED!" "DEADED!" "Don't worry. I have a lasso, which will grab that and swing us over that, past that, across this, down there, and into it!" The bee took a microphone-looking object out of it's pocket, which was engraved into it's skin. The bee was pink, with yellow lines, after all. A red baseball cap on his hands. The bee switched it on, and started to twirl it around. "HERE GOES!'" Pope shouted. The microphone picked up his voice, and shouted loudly

"HERE GOES!" Several machine guns got up and put them in the top room. "W-h-a-t s-h- o-u-l-d w-e d-o w-i-t-h t-h-e-m b-o-s-s-?" asked Grumpy Face, who was 999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999 999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999 999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999 999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999 99999999Km tall, and 11111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111 11111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111 11111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111Km wide. Nothing new, then. The pea didn't move. Suddenly, Jake ran up and ate the pea. "ALARM. DDKOOKDOGKE. KILL. NOW. SHOUT. DESTROY!" Jake and the bee ran. They were blocked. A machine gun got ready to kill them. They were trapped. This was the end! Pope closed his eyes...


	12. The Time Trilogy - B2 - C3

CHAPTER 3: RUNNING!

Now is a perfect point in the story to explain how Jake was not a dog in book one. He was! He looked like a human, and can speak like one, too. The machine gun scanned him as a dog, even though he looked human! Now then, on with the story...

...but Jake didn't. He grabbed Pope and stepped over the machine guns. "672 second to warp." said one. Jake ran. He ran. Also, he ran, Oh, I forgot: He ran a bit more. I didn't mention the fact he ran, either. Or that he ran. He ran. Ran. Ran. Jump! Ran. Out at last. Actually, there was one big staircase. Jake ran out, and into the time machine. "We have to go to 2011!" "OMG, I don't care, you big donkey!" "SHUT UP." "FART" Jake pushed Pope out of the machine and went to 2011. 100 seconds... 50 seconds... 11 seconds. Jake arrived. He was in a court. There was a person, and some people. "Give him a big hand, folks" said someone. Suddenly a warp appeared and a hand crushed the person. "Don't give anyone a hand." shouted Jake. Up in someones bedroom, someone was making a paper helicopter. "Give me a hand, please." A hand came, if a little big! Jake ran. And, err, ran. When he got to the middle, the hand was gone. "Everyone, say give me a leg from now on, okay!" Suddenly the ground trembled as a leg was walking, well 2 legs, across the arena. Say Head. A head came. Say Bottom. A bottom came. Willie! A WILLIE came! It started beaming yellow lasers! "****!" said Jake. A finger came. "%^&*&&&&%$%$$£) (*********&%%%%^%$%******************!" said Jake. A eyeball came. Jake ran, hence the name of the chapter, and ran, and raaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa aan! There, had to do that. So Jake thought all was lost... Somewhere in Japan, a person had lost his glove. Suddenly, everyone lost everything. With all hope quite literally lost, would Jake conquer the evil. No. No, he would not. "Can I have a tulip?" asked a machine gun. Jake ran inside the time machine, and brought out a plant called a tulip. "Ooh, can I have that?" asked a machine gun. "Only if you never come back." "Okay." and went. Jake did this with all of them. However, the tulips were also suddenly lost. With everything lost, it was all revealed to be in Jakes Mouth. Prison! Jake made sticky notes out of dust, wrote them all down with a bug spray, and was told to leave. THE END... OF PRISON! Jake hurried down to the time machine and found a trillion chocolate bars on the floor. After eating them all, Jake was extremely fat! "Oh, no, paradox time." He had to be the right shape. Jake ate 0.000000000001 pea a day, and was too thin. Eventually, he was the right size. "Oh, no, now I've eaten too much" cried Jake. After 17 years of sicking it up, he realised he was too old, he set the time machine to 2011 stepped out side, it set off, he had done none of those things, all was good. OH, no now he hadn't done any sticky notes. He had to make the invasion come back. CHAPTER 2:THE BEE! Blah, blah, blah. Run, run, run. Now he didn't eat all the chocolate bars. But now look. There were now chocolate bars when he saw himself do it. Yet if he touched them, he would have sticky hands. Dilemma! Also, the note said nothing about eating his bottom! "I think..it's finally time to eat my hat!" said Jake, who had no hat at all. Jake ate his head off, and shortly after realised he was dead. Horrible paradox created.


	13. The Time Trilogy - B2 - C4

CHAPTER 4: PLOT TWIST!

358 years later. After all, deaded people are immortal.

Jake woke up, headless. A gang of people were playing golf with his head. "Ouch" said his head. It's hard to walk around when seeing from a different angle, but Jake managed to get a head. Someone else's head! He bit it off with his head, and put it on. It fit perfectly. Everyone else ran away. Jake didn't know he had the wrong head on, so he went to his relative, his gran: Mrs. OldasIamIstillpackquiteapunchsogetoutthewayputyourefeetup! In shorts, it was the shape of a anteater. A deaded one. Jake went by taxi. By not paying, he went on the top of the taxi, and the driver didn't see him. He was safe...from the driver. Trillions of teddy bears were chasing him. After all, it was 2369. Don't think so, work it out. The driver was taken out, while Jake scrambled under the teddy car. They had no way to know where he was going, so actually he got off and ran away. Come to think of it, he told the driver, went on top but the driver thought he was in the seat, the driver would tell the teddy's, they'd go to gran's, so... Jake ran under the car and grabbed one of the they arrived, all of his hands had come off because they twisted too much on the wheels. He got to Gran's, and smashed through the window because the door was locked. One of his legs had gone, too! He squirmed into a bed, and sniffed. Nothing. He wheezed. Nothing. He screamed. Nothing happened. Then he remembered: his Gran was death. Not a typo, she was named Death and everyone knew Death was deaf. So... he squirmed to her table. There she was. He simply had to get behind her without being seen. He ran. Then he remembered: she was also blind, and voiceless. She was in a wheelchair, too. He got up and pounced on her. He bit off her hands and one leg, put them on, and finally remembered why she wasn't reacting: Death was dead! So he ran. And, err, ran. In fact he ran past the mall, past the ball, past the call, past the stall, past , past the universe, in fact he remembered: He was actually Ham. You see, what I'm trying to say is... This story is impossible, so...

HE WAS DREAMING! Yes, very big twist. But you see, the dream was actually real, because he lived in 7840, and the dream machine existed!


	14. The Time Trilogy - B2 - C5

CHAPTER 5: THE ULTIMATE TRAP!

Actually, saying the ultimate trap isn't that ultimate, is it? Now is the time I will say there is a very bad part of the story near the end, so I advise you to stop reading NOW! I will end this sentence with stop STOP! The only way the even slightly feel the pain would be to throw yourself under a bus STOP! Now then, onwards...

The machine worked like this, you put the head-part on, activate the machine, go to sleep, and you can't wake up until the machine turns off. And the machine Jake was using was on, and was on forever unless someone would turn it off. Now, the things you dream of appear near you to give ideas of what to write about and stuff. This means you could have a impossible shape exist and be there yet impossible. So, Jake was in one because someone wanted money. To get that you would make the machine work for 6 hours. Jake's had been on for 243 hours and was still going. Jake had volunteered to do it as the first person ever! Now, the machine started turning off every 12 hours unless you had 20 batteries which the person bought because he had the money from doing it before. Now then, onwards...

Jake's machine was turning off, but the person turned it back on. However, not far away, in a cage, were all the people he'd found, and were trying to wake him up, but were put inside a cage. However, Pope and the bee could easily get through the bars...if there were any. It was only guarded by one guard, and should he chose to free them, he would. This guard happened to be Ham pretending to be a guard. Ham let them out. "Right. We need to free Jake" said Ham. "Correct" said Pope. "Right, here's the plan..." Jake was inside a laboratory, and 45 other people were also being used by a dream machine. I said being used on purpose. They weren't using it, it was using them. It was draining their brain so that it could fulfil it's task, and all for money. Ham sneaked into another room. "That was easy." said Ham. The bee stung the machine, but it would not come off. It had been on him for so long it would not come off. "Pull!" shouted Ham, and all three pulled. The bee tried someone else, but it would not come off, either. "They're all trapped." shouted the bee, as a metal sphere came around him. "Look out" shouted Pope, but it was too late. The bee was stuck inside a metal sphere. Ham ran over to him, but it wouldn't come off. Suddenly, the man woke up. "AH HA HA HA HA HA HA HEE HEE HEEHEE HEE HEEEEEEEEEEEEEE(45 hours later) EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!" screamed the man. By now everyone had fallen asleep. "Oh, well, if it's that easy..." The man clicked as the sphere came off of Ham. The man reached out, and Ham slapped him. "YEEEEEEEEEEEOUCHHHHHHHHHHH!" shuddered the man. Suddenly Pope and the bee woke up and pulled him to the ground. "I-I-I...I-I-SURRENDER!" shouted the man, as 3 sphere's came around Pope, the bee, and Ham. "Free everyone here..or else." said Ham. "OH, HO HO HO HO HOO HOO HOO WHEEEE HOO HO-WHEE! I'LL STOP JAKE'S MACHINE IF THAT'S WHAT YOU DESIRE." Jake suddenly woke up. "Wha-" startled Jake. "HO, HO HO. JAKE GLAD YOU COULD JOIN. WATCH AS YOU'RE FRIENDS DIE! HO HO HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE EEEEEE(900 Hours later) EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!

Pope, the bee and Ham were captured in the spheres. "No. You can't" cried Jake. "AH, BUT YES! I CAN. I'VE WON! AND NOW IT'S TIME TO GO TO BED!"  
The man clicked as Jake was forced back to sleep. And that's THE END!

Nearly...


	15. The Time Trilogy - B2 - C6

CHAPTER 6: THE RESCUE!

Suddenly, the teddy bears appeared and grabbed the man. They clicked and the man was inside a sphere. Jake was awake. Pope, the bee and Ham were free. "NO, NO, NO, (DEEP BREATH, READER) NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Jake, Pope, Ham and the bee, watched as the teddy's carried the sphere to the lava pit, and threw him in. Just before he died there was a click as the whole building began to shake. "It's falling apart!" cried Jake. "We must escape." There was a door near a fire, which had started burning when the shake came. "RUN!"


	16. The Time Trilogy - B2 - C7

FINAL CHAPTER: A TAD MORE RUNNING!

Everyone ran! The bee flew and got there first and went through a crack, and out a window. Jake paused as he saw a huge gap in the staircase. No-one could jump that far. "Stop!" shouted Jake. "What did he say?" asked Pope. "I think he said run down here!" said Ham. They all ran down, and Jake fell into the hole... "Whoops" said Ham. "He's going to die!" said Pope. Jake fell onto Miss. Miss! "Gfmf the executiormfn roomf nomf!" burbled Miss. Miss. Miss. Miss opened her mouth to gasp and Pope fell into it. "Sorry" said Pope. Ham landed on Pope and the bee flew onto Ham. "Safe at last!" said Pope. "No, the buildings still falling. The bee flew. Ham ran. Jake ran. Miss. Miss stayed still. Ham, Jake, Pope and the bee were outside. "Where's Miss. Miss?" asked Jake. "Oh, no!" said Ham. Miss. Miss was turned flat as paper. In fact, she turned into paper! Jake ran inside, got her out, and everyone drew on her. They put her in the recycling bin, and Miss. Miss died there. The Time machine was standing there, and Pope went inside. You see, the dream was endless. Now Jake could go to any time. Jake went in. There were loads of chocolate bars on the floor. Pope and Ham were scoffing them in the biggest hole in their faces, their nostril. "Oh no!" said Jake, and he suddenly realised he had just eaten one chocolate bar...

THE END!


End file.
